Many kinds of transitions happen when caring for another’s children.
Beginning with a newborn, babies transition from rolling over to sitting up to crawling to pulling up to walking, formula to cereal and solid food, and making sounds to talking…and all of which happen within the first 2 years of their life. More changes come with potty training and preschool and so on and so forth.
Each day in our personal lives, as well as on the job, we deal with the transitions of growing up. Some transitions we breeze through and others we struggle with, but the most important thing that we can do with our employer during each transition is to talk about it.
Encourage your employers to baby-proof early before the baby is mobile so that by the time you have a crawling baby, you are already in the habit of latching & closing doors and putting the gates on stairs. It’s one less thing you need to remember. Baby proofing requires some thought and planning, and sitting down with your employers to discuss any concerns and to develop a plan to deal with safety issues is a good way to begin the process.
When preparing to potty train, discuss it with your employers, creating a plan so that everyone is on the same page, doing the same thing. Each developmental stage requires at least a little bit of discussion and planning. When working with our employers as a parenting team, anticipating the upcoming changes, finding solutions and talking about how to execute the plan is what makes nanny/employer relationships work.
One transition parents seldom discuss is how a nanny will transition with the family as the children grow up. This is such an important discussion. It’s easiest to have this conversation during the interview by simply asking how long the family anticipates having a nanny and how they plan to handle the transition. The discussion can also be revisited when the child begins pre-school. Knowing the long-term needs of the family will provide the nanny a plan to face the transitions and a professional path forward.
By bringing these issues up before they happen, a nanny can discuss them in a less emotional way instead of waiting to discuss them 6 months before the child starts kindergarten and the nanny must face the absence of the child in their daily life.
Having a plan for the transitions will offer the nanny and family a way to more easily engage in the midst of the transition as it occurs. Don’t treat upcoming transitions as though they will go away if you ignore them. Sometimes this is a difficult topic for an employer to bring up, but it should not be ignored.
Confronting the situation and having a mutually agreeable plan in place will be a great comfort to you as you grow with a family. Remember that lots of things can change even when planning ahead. However, if the doors of communication remain open on this topic, a traumatic and painful end to employment is less likely to occur. And as an added bonus, a nanny may also have a better chance of maintaining a lifelong relationship with the family.
A special Thank You to Glenda Propst, long time INA member, former INA Nanny of the Year, and the heart and soul behind Nanny Transitions for sharing her wisdom with us.