When you think about the type of home you want for your children, you likely would answer that you’d desire a place for them to feel safe, comfortable, and empowered to discover who they are. While no home is ever perfect all the time, it can be a place where children feel stable and nurtured. Here are some ways to cultivate a nurturing environment for your child.
Give them unrushed, unhurried time on a regular basis.
Your children want to be seen. They want to be heard. And when it comes to feeling valued and nurtured, that can really only be done with time. Focus on giving them your undivided attention on a regular basis – away from your phone or laptop screen and only with them! That might mean an uninterrupted trip to the park or to the zoo each week, with regular family dinners, or by participating in a special hobby or activity that you both enjoy doing together. Put down the distractions and ask them questions, give them a hug, and focus on listening to what’s in their heads and hearts.
Show acceptance.
Feeling nurtured and accepted are a package deal. Support your child’s interests and nurture them by participating in them, asking about them, and listening about them – even if they aren’t what you enjoy. Work on showing them acceptance no matter who they are or what they are passionate about. After all, they are unique individuals and there is no one else like them in the world – and that is incredibly special.
Model conflict resolution well.
Yelling, uncontrolled tempers, and outbursts that are dramatic and unexpected can cause turmoil for children. Remember that children see how you handle conflict, and they will naturally start modeling that behavior. Be conscious about handling conflict with calmness and wisdom, as much as you can. If they see conflict handled and resolved with stability, strength, and kindness rather than explosive anger, this will instill in them that problems and disagreements can be solved, and healthy relationships are possible.
Set guidelines and boundaries.
One of the most critical components of nurturing is showing structure and boundaries. Children thrive on schedules, routine, and structure. They feel safe, protected, and nurtured in a world that is predictable and organized. That doesn’t mean you have to have a house that is spotless every day. It does mean, however, that rules and values are consistent. Don’t hesitate to explain why you live or operate that way, either. As they grow up, they will see why those things are important to your family and how they fit into them.
And last, remember that nothing can be accomplished without love.
Creating a nurturing environment cannot be done without love and letting your children know that you love them, no matter what. Tell them out loud that they are loved. Demonstrate love through action, too.
Love conquers everything – nurturing begins with love and ends with it, too.