By: Sue Downey
Infants love mirrors. But there is a great deal happening in the development of the child as they gaze into that shiny surface.
When a baby gazes into a mirror they can recognize that a baby is in the mirror, but they may not yet understand that they are looking at themselves. This awareness develops sometime between 15 and 24 months of age. But that doesn’t mean that letting your 6-month-old look into the mirror is not useful. Mirrors are fascinating and can be a great way for babies to learn language skills as you point out the parts of the face or make silly faces and name emotions that correspond.
Once a baby understands that the mirror is a reflection of themselves and not another baby, the journey really begins. Note: Want to know if the baby understands? Do the lipstick test. Put a dot of lipstick on the baby’s nose. Does the baby reach for their own nose to wipe it off or reach towards the mirror to wipe it off?
So then your 18-month-old kiddo knows they are looking at their reflection and they can see and begin to process the fact that they are indeed a separate and unique being. They can now start to get a sense that they have their own thoughts and feelings. A sense of self allows the development of conscious emotions. Children then start to see that others have feelings and thoughts as well. That they are in fact independent human beings!
Mirror play doesn’t have to end there. Mirrors can help your 2 and 3-year-olds develop an emotional vocabulary. That same game in the mirror when you would make a baby laugh is crucial as your 3-year-old learns what mad or sad looks like on your face, then on his face in the mirror. They learn to connect certain gestures, body positions, and expressions with a complex series of feelings. Important work to help them regulate these emotions later.
Grab that mirror and put it in front of your child as you have a conversation. Let them notice the patterns and cadence of spoken languages and see the position of your mouth, tongue, and teeth as you make specific noises. Watch as they observe their part in the back and forth. Mirrors allow your baby to watch and see how sounds are made. This language activity is wonderful and even helpful for preschoolers who may be struggling to get that /r/ or /ck/ sound out.
Mirrors are a simple but important tool we can use for many purposes. That is probably why an infant safe mirror is one of my favorite baby shower gifts ever!!
Sue Downey is a nanny and has been since she accidentally found the profession 25 years ago. She started as a live out nanny for 4 boys in Cincinnati, Ohio and then moved on to the Philadelphia area as a live in nanny. She has stayed in the suburbs of Philly ever since. She has worked with many kinds of families and all ages of children from birth thru teens. To increase the opportunities for professional development, Sue was the co founder of Nannypalooza, a conference for nannies. Nannypalooza is now celebrating 15 years of building community and providing education to nannies across the globe. It is now home to interNational Nanny Training Day, which every spring hosts local events to celebrate and educate nannies. Along with her business partner Kellie Geres, Sue developed Our Nanny Diary, journals and paperwork to increase communication between nannies and families. She has led workshops at the International Nanny Association conference, National Education for Young Children conference, Nannypalooza as well as local and regional gatherings. Sue’s full time job is caring for a family just outside Philadelphia, where she spends her days trying to not step on legos, playing dragons, and reading the same book over and over and over again and loving every minute of it all!
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